In the final stages of a terminal illness, it can become evident that in spite of the best care, attention, and treatment, your loved one is approaching the end of their life. At this point, the focus usually changes to making them as comfortable as possible in order to make the most of the time they have left. Depending on the nature of the illness and your loved one’s circumstances, this final stage period may last from a matter of weeks or months to several years. Simple acts of daily care are often combined with complex end-of-life decisions and painful feelings of grief and loss. You may experience a range of distressing and conflicting emotions, such as sorrow and anxiety, anger and denial, or even relief that your loved one’s struggle is at an end, or guilt that you’ve somehow failed as their caregiver. Whatever you’re experiencing, it’s important to recognize that late-stage caregiving requires plenty of support. Late-stage care is also a time for saying goodbye to your loved one, to resolve any differences, forgive any grudges, and to express your love. While late-stage caregiving can be an extremely painful time, having this opportunity to say goodbye can also be a gift to help you come to terms with your loss and make the transition from nursing and grief towards acceptance and healing.

Perhaps your loved one can no longer talk, sit, walk, eat, or make sense of the world. Routine activities, including bathing, feeding, dressing, and turning may require total support and increased physical strength on your part as their caregiver. You can find support for these tasks from Mary Abey Care. 

Even if the person’s cognitive and memory functions are depleted, their capacity to feel frightened or at peace, loved or lonely, and sad or secure remains, the most helpful interventions are those which ease pain and discomfort and provide the chance for them to experience meaningful connections to family and loved ones.

Respite care can give you and your family a break from the intensity of end-of-life caregiving. It may be simply a case of having a us to sit with your loved one for a few hours so you can meet friends for coffee or watch a movie, or it could involve professional palliative care.